[TV Recap] WWE Raw – 12/17/2012 (The 2012 Slammy Awards)

raw-recap

Raw 12/17 Preview:

  • A lot of stories to expand on after the events at TLC 24 hours ago (results here), but the big one concerns AJ Lee‘s betrayal of John Cena, costing him his ladder match against Dolph Ziggler and robbing him of a World Heavyweight Championship opportunity. How will Cena react? And more importantly has Lee turned her attentions to Ziggler?
  • In other TLC news, The Shield were victorious in their first in-ring outing, defeating the team of Ryback and Team Hell No in a Tables, Ladders, and Chairs match. What is next on The Shield’s docket?
  • Post-TLC fall-out aside, this week’s episode will also center around the 2012 Slammy Awards. Who will come up big? Who will come up short? Will we see any long-forgotten faces?

Click “read more” for a full recap of the show, featuring these events and so much more.

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Quick Match Results:

  1. Rey Mysterio (w/ Sin Cara) pinned Damien Sandow (w/ Cody Rhodes) (3:10).
  2. Kaitlyn pinned *WWE Divas Champion* Eve Torres in a non-title match (2:00).
  3. *WWE Intercontinental Champion* Kofi Kingston pinned Tensai in a non-title match (1:08).
  4. The Great Khali (w/ Natalya) pinned David Otunga (1:54).
  5. Brodus Clay pinned JTG (1:51).
  6. Cody Rhodes (w/ Damien Sandow) pinned Sin Cara (w/ Rey Mysterio) (4:15).
  7. The Miz/Alberto Del Rio/Tommy Dreamer defeated 3MB (Heath Slater/Jinder Mahal/Drew McIntyre) in a six-man tag team match (14:12).
  8. Ryback defeated *WWE U.S. Champion* Antonio Cesaro by countout in a non-title match (2:34).
  9. John Cena/Vickie Guerrero defeated Dolph Ziggler/AJ Lee by DQ when Big E Langston interfered (4:25).

*****

[Tonight on RAW]: The 2012 Slammy Awards, as “voted” by the WWE Universe.

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We’re live in Philadelphia, PA. We see a shot of a giant Slammy, then head to the announce booth where Michael Cole welcomes the home audience. He’s in a tux, as are his co-announcers JBL and Jerry Lawler. They shift gears to TLC and talk about AJ Lee‘s betrayal as well as The Shield‘s first match (with a nice slow-mo shot of Seth Rollins going through the table). Cole announces our first Slammy winner will be announced after this match.

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“BOOYAKA! BOOYAKA! 619!”

Rey Mysterio makes his way out for the opening contest. After an awkward period of time, his partner Sin Cara comes out to accompany him. Mysterio’s opponent, Damien Sandow, is already in the ring (his partner Cody Rhodes is in his corner). Cole and Lawler tell everyone how to download the WWE App because that’s the only way you can vote.

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[Match #1]: Rey Mysterio (w/ Sin Cara) Vs. Damien Sandow (w/ Cody Rhodes)

Sandow attacks Mysterio right at the bell and throws him through the bottom rope and out to the floor. Sandow follows him out and throws him into the ringpost. Sandow rolls him back in and goes for the pin. 2-count. Sandow follows up with a Russian legsweep and the Elbow of Disdain for another 2-count. Sandow locks Mysterio in a seated cross face chicken wing. Mysterio gets to his feet but gets a forearm to the back during his break-out attempt. Sandow corners Mysterio and drives the shoulder repeatedly into his midsection. Sandow places Mysterio on the top turnbuckle and goes for a second-rope superplex but Mysterio knocks him off. Mysterio flies and hits a seated senton, followed by a spinning head scissors and a seated dropkick for a 2-count. Sandow catches Mysterio with a kick to the gut and hits a running neckbreaker for a 2-count. Sandow goes for a power slam but Mysterio reverses it into a DDT. He dropkicks Sandow onto the second rope, then connects with the 619. Mysterio heads to the top rope and connects with the splash for the 1…2…3.

Winner [via Pinfall]: Rey Mysterio (3:10)

  • [[Thoughts]]: Eh not much to say here. It was a quick and fun match but nothing truly worth noting. Looks like the wrestling is taking a massive backseat to the Slammy Awards tonight. I shouldn’t be surprised.

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[[The 2012 Slammy Awards: “Tell Me I Did Not Just See That”]]

Smackdown GM Booker T makes his way out to present the first award of the evening, the one named after him. Before he presents it, he tells everyone to download the WWE App. Ugh. The nominees for this award are…

Brad Maddox’s Low Blow (Hell in a Cell 2012)
Sheamus beats Daniel Bryan in 18 seconds for the World Heavyweight Championship (Wrestlemania 28)
Kofi Kingston saves himself from elimination with a handstand (Royal Rumble 2012)
CM Punk makes The Rock “Go to Sleep” (Raw 1000)

Before Booker can announce the winner, he’s interrupted by the return of The Boogeyman who comes crawling out. Boogeyman smashes the clock over his head as Booker stares in disbelief. He pulls out the worms…and we go to commercial…

-Commercial Break-

Booker is still staring in disbelief at the fact The Boogeyman showed up and disappeared. He says to the crowd “tell me I did not just see that”. Back to the awards. Brad Maddox makes his way out to pre-emptively accept the award as Booker announces that Kofi Kingston is the one who won! Kingston makes his way out and accepts the award as Maddox looks on all pouty-like. Kingston does a babyface “I always wanted one” speech and thanks the crowd. He walks away, Slammy in the air.

  • [[Thoughts]]: Kingston’s handstand was pretty impressive but I would assume a referee costing someone the WWE Championship would be much more important. I’m already way too invested in this fake awards show.

—–

Eve Torres and Kaitlyn are already in the ring for the next match.

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[Match #2]: [WWE Divas Champion] Eve Torres Vs. Kaitlyn

Torres and Kaitlyn brawl all over the mat until Torres bails to the outside. Kaitlyn rams Torres face-first into the barricade repeatedly, then slaps her. Kaitlyn rolls Torres back in, but Torres catches her with a dropkick to the leg. Torres rams the back of Kaitlyn’s head repeatedly into the mat then throws her into the corner. Torres chokes Kaitlyn with her boot in the corner. Kaitlyn sits on the top turnbuckle and chokes Kaitlyn hangman-style. Torres goes for it again but Kaitlyn hits a series of back elbows. Kaitlyn picks her up off the turnbuckle and hits a gutbuster for the 1…2…3! Uh what?

Winner [via Pinfall]: Kaitlyn (2:00)

  • [[Thoughts]]: Uh…what? Why? Whatever.

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[[The 2012 Slammy Awards: “Comeback of the Year”]]

The New Age Outlaws, Road Dogg and Billy Gunn, make their way out to present the award. Gunn tries to go to the ring but Road Dogg keeps him, telling him they are going to the podium instead. Road Dogg welcomes Philly to the “Dogghouse” then does the whole New Age Outlaws mic schtick. Instead of doing the “Suck It” thing, Gunn lists the nominees which are:

-Brock Lesnar

Chris Jericho

D-X (Triple H/HBK/New Age Outlaws/X-Pac)

Jerry “The King” Lawler

Cole reminds people to vote on the WWE App as we go to commercial.

-Commercial Break-

We go back to The New Age Outlaws. The winner is…Jerry “The King” Lawler. No shocker there. Lawler leaves the announce table and sprints up the ramp to the stage. Lawler thanks everyone and God then says it’s great to be back.

  • [[Thoughts]]: How funny would it have been if Brock Lesnar won? WWE fans have no balls!

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Kofi Kingston makes his way to the ring. His opponent, Tensai, is already in the ring.

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[Match #3]: *WWE Intercontinental Champion* Kofi Kingston Vs. Tensai

Kingston launches himself at Tensai, but Tensai catches him and throws him to the mat. Tensai follows up with a series of elbowdrops and attempts a pinfall but only gets a 2. Tensai headbutts Kingston repeatedly in the corner then connects with a Vader Bomb for a 2-count. Kingston side steps a corner splash and hits the Trouble in Paradise out of nowhere for the 3-count.

Winner [via Pinfall]: Kofi Kingston (1:08)

  • [[Thoughts]]: Cool to see Kingston actually connect with the Trouble in Paradise for once but outside of that…whatever.

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[Post-Match]: Wade Barrett attacks Kingston during his celebration routine. Barrett throws Kingston into the ring post on the outside then knocks him out with the Bull Hammer and falls over in the process himself. Awkward.

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Cole and Lawler try to teach the WWE Universe how to vote on the WWE App on both iPhone and Android.

—–

[[The 2012 Slammy Awards: “Kiss of the Year”]]

Vickie Guerrero makes her way out to present for “Kiss of the Year”. The nominees are…

AJ Lee & Daniel Bryan

AJ Lee & Kane

AJ Lee & CM Punk

AJ Lee & John Cena

The winner will be announced after this commercial break!

-Commercial Break-

We go back to Guerrero at the podium. Before she announces the winner, Guerrero just wants to say she would never be nominated for this award because she would never abuse her power or authority to get superstars to have romantic relationships with her. The winning kiss is…AJ Lee & John Cena.

“Start It Up!” plays and out comes AJ Lee skipping to the podium. Guerrero says before she gets the Slammy, she has to explain her actions last night at TLC. Lee grabs the Slammy out of Guerrero’s hands and says she doesn’t owe anyone anything. Lee says she’s spent the last year caring what everyone thinks, but not anymore. Guerrero calls her a “piece of trash”, which causes an argument to break out between the two of them. Dolph Ziggler runs out and separates the two. Lee says the Kiss of the Year was “nothing compared to this” and she leaps onto Ziggler and starts kissing him. Guerrero screeches and stalks off as Ziggler/Lee make out. She jumps off, grabs her Slammy, then skips away. Ziggler is in disbelief and makes his way to the back.

  • [[Thoughts]]: At least they remembered to do some story development. But it’s kind of weird; she played herself off like a heel but Guerrero still yelled at her like she was still supposed to be a face. The kiss with Ziggler didn’t help either. I guess we’ll see what happens.

—–

The Great Khali makes his way out to the ring with Natalya. He’s in action next!

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-Commercial Break-

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[Match #4]: The Great Khali (w/ Natalya) Vs. David Otunga

Otunga ducks a strike and tries to mount some offense, but Khali is huge so that does nothing. Khali cracks Otunga with a forearm to the nose then unleashes a chop on Otunga’s chest in the corner. He moves Otunga into another corner then does it again. Khali whips Otunga into a corner, but Otunga side steps a splash and Khali gets his leg caught on the top rope. Otunga beats him down to the mat and works over Khali’s left leg, wrapping it around the bottom rope. Otunga continues the assault in the corner but runs into an elbow smash and big boot. Khali cracks Otunga in the skull and finishes up with a Brain Chop for the 1…2…3.

Winner [via Pinfall]: The Great Khali (1:54)

  • [[Thoughts]]: Yeah let’s just pretend this never happened and going on living our lives.

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[Post-Match]: Khali and Natalya dance in celebration.

—–

We go down the nominees for the big Slammy Award, the Superstar of the Year (the voice of Ric Flair introduces this video package so I guess he’s the “big surprise” Cole/Lawler were talking about). They are as follows:

Sheamus

John Cena

CM Punk

The Big Show

Cole tells the WWE Universe to vote then says they will have the reveal plus their “special guest” right after this commercial.

  • [[Thoughts]]: Their special guest being Ric Flair because they just gave it away by accident.

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-Commercial Break-

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Yet another reminder from Cole and Lawler how to download the WWE App and vote.

  • [[Thoughts]]: I GET IT.

—–

[[2012 Slammy Awards: “Superstar of the Year”]]

Justin Roberts introduces the presenter for the next award…“The Nature Boy” Ric Flair! How shocking and not just spoiled five seconds ago! Flair makes his way out, stylin’ and profilin’, with the crowd on their feet. Flair soaks in the applause. Flair gives a few “Woo!”s then namedrops Philly for the cheap pop. And the winner of “Superstar of the Year” is…John Cena.

Cena makes his way out to accept the award, hugging Flair before making his way to the podium itself. The crowd boos him out of the building. After more booing, Cena gets into his acceptance speech and talks about what it means to be “Superstar of the Year” then recognizes the loyalty of the WWE Universe. Cena then says that out of respect, the Superstar of the Year should be…RIC FLAIR. Cena leaves, letting Flair bask.

Before Flair can get into his own random acceptance speech, “Cult of Personality” hits and out comes WWE Champion CM Punk and Paul Heyman. Punk is still on crutches. Punk calls this all stupid, from voting for Cena to Cena giving it to Flair. Punk runs down Cena’s horrible year and calls him a “loser” like the Philly fans and Flair himself. Punk tells Flair he never wanted to be the “Nature Boy”, he wanted to be himself. Punk says he’s been WWE Champion for 393 days and is the actual “Superstar of the Year”. Punk says he’s the man and does a really crappy “Woo!”.

Flair looks at his “Rolox” (his words) and says it’s time for Punk to go. Flair says Punk has enough baggage that he couldn’t walk a block, referring to Heyman. Flair says he hasn’t been here but he’s been watching, then asks Punk if his own baggage was his four wives or his two HOF rings. Punk says with one leg he could beat Flair and everyone in Philly. Flair takes that challenge and throws his coat at Punk. Flair heads to the ring and beckons Punk to follow him. Punk starts crutching his way to the ring as Heyman gives him a pep-talk.

  • [[Thoughts]]: This whole thing was dead in the water until CM Punk showed up and I don’t think I’ve been happier to see the WWE Champion in recent months. Cena winning was ridiculous, but hey that’s the vote so whatever, and him giving the Slammy to Flair was even more ridiculous. To have Punk come out and call bullsh*t was great and very very very welcome. As for Flair…cool to see him back in the WWE but I’m not completely thrilled. Mostly because I watched him in TNA like a year ago so his arrival isn’t really all that crazy. Also Rolox. That happened.

—–

-Commercial Break-

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[[In-Ring Confrontation: CM Punk/Ric Flair]]

CM Punk makes his way into the ring after taking his time up the stairs along with Paul HeymanRic Flair stares Punk down as he crutches closer. Punk jabs Flair in the gut with a crutch, then smashes the crutch over his back. Punk then does a mock-version of the Flair Strut. Awesome. Punk takes his other crutch and lifts it up, but Flair thumbs him in the eye. Flair grabs Heyman’s legs, drops him, then locks on the Figure Four! After a few seconds, Heyman screaming in pain the entire time, Flair relinquishes the hold then celebrates as Flair’s theme plays.

The music dies down and Flair grabs a mic and says he just came here for a good time. He says “I love you” to Jerry Lawler and then says he told Vince McMahon he wants to die either in a WWE ring or with a girl in Philadelphia. Flair continues talking about Philly, until The Shield‘s music hits. Dean Ambrose/Seth Rollins/Roman Reigns start descending from the crowd and Flair tells them to “come on down”. The Shield stare him down as we go to commercial.

-Commercial Break-

A brawl has erupted during the break. Team Hell No have come out to help Flair against The Shield. Ambrose decks Flair in the ring, then rolls out to help attack Daniel Bryan along with Rollins. Reigns is taking it to Kane and then Ambrose goes to help him as well. They toss Kane into the barricade. Reigns takes off the top of the WWE announcers table as Ambrose/Rollins bring Flair outside. They set up for the triple powerbomb…

“FEED! ME! MORE!”

Ryback makes his way out for the save. He throws Ambrose into the barricade and Reigns into the ring post. Ryback picks up Rollins and slams him on the table but the table doesn’t break because Rollins weighs like 2 pounds. Ryback beats on Rollins until he escapes through the crowd. The other two members of The Shield follow suit, and the faces all roll into the ring. Flair shakes hands with Ryback, Kane, and Bryan, thanking them. They lift Flair on their shoulders and parade him around the ring as we go to commercial.

  • [[Thoughts]]: That was undeniably entertaining as hell. Flair locking Heyman in the Figure Four was great and The Shield’s pre-commercial descent was perfect. The brawl was a little weird, especially since it started during the break, and I didn’t like The Shield looking like b*tches but I guess it made sense because, you know, Flair. Just a very entertaining bunch of segments there. One question though: why didn’t Cena help? Flair’s good enough for his Slammy but not his help?

—–

-Commercial Break-

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Ric Flair is backstage with Team Hell No still thanking him. Kane is excited they got to The Shield and screamed “Yes!”. Daniel Bryan screamed “No!”. Flair yelled “Woo!” in between. Cue Ron Simmons for a “DAMN!” to finish things off.

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Brodus Clay is finishing his entrance. His opponent, JTG, is already in the ring.

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[Match #5]: Brodus Clay Vs. JTG

Clay is all offense with a belly to belly suplex and a legdrop but JTG tries to fight out of the corner. JTG comes out of nowhere with a horrible Buff Blockbuster (Clay didn’t fall on his back) for a 1-count. JTG applies a reverse chinlock then a front chancery when Clay gets to his feet. Clay throws him off then drops JTG with a whole bunch of clotheslines. Clay whips JTG into the corner and connects with the splash, following it up with a T-bone suplex, midsection headbutt, and running splash for the 1…2…3.

Winner [via Pinfall]: Brodus Clay (1:51)

  • [[Thoughts]]: I hope the WWE fans in attendance realized they didn’t come tonight for any actual matches. This was what it was. Clay wins another squash and JTG continues to be of absolutely no value.

—–

[[2012 Slammy Awards: “LOL Moment of the Year”]]

Santino Marella comes out wearing a suit. Tensai falls out from behind and has a cold pack taped to his head, still feeling the effects of Kingston’s Trouble in Paradise. Marella tries not to laugh while talking. He tells “Albert” that it’s his turn to talk but Marella decides to read his lines for him. He calls Tensai “Fat Albert” and Tensai grabs him. Marella says he was just reading from the teleprompter but Tensai says there is no teleprompter. Ha ha. The nominees are…

-The Rock throwing John Cena merch into Boston Harbor.

-The group therapy segments that brought Team Hell No together. (“SHUT UP HAROLD!”)

Randy Orton dumps hot coffee and chili on Ricardo Rodriguez and sends Matt Striker face-first into pie.

Vickie Guerrero shows off her “dance moves”.

The winner is next!

-Commercial Break-

We’re back and Marella asks Tensai if he wants to read the winner (he doesn’t). The winner is…The Rock litters! Marella says The Rock couldn’t be here in person to accept the award so he accepts it on his behalf. Marella says if Rock doesn’t come to claim it he’s going to keep it. They go to leave, and Daniel Bryan grabs the Slammy and goes to the podium. He says it should be their Slammy and repeatedly yells “No!” until Kane drags him off.

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[Match #6]: Sin Cara (w/ Rey Mysterio) Vs. Cody Rhodes (w/ Damien Sandow)

The “mood lighting” is back. Rhodes gets the early advantage but Cara fights back and hits the springboard arm drag sending Rhodes to the outside. Cara follows up with a suicide dive through the second ropes. Damien Sandow looks to get involved but Rey Mysterio stops him. Rhodes attacks Cara and rolls him back in, stomping him repeatedly. Rhodes connects with a hesitation front-face suplex for a 2-count. Snapmare into a submission hold by Rhodes. Rhodes lets go of the hold and stomps on him before choking him with his boot. Rhodes goes for the cover and only gets a 2-count. Cara tries to mount a comeback but Rhodes sends him hard into the corner. Rhodes starts showboating as Cara rolls to the apron. He catches a running Rhodes with a kick followed by a springboard dropkick. Cara ducks a clothesline and connects with a hurricanrana. Cara readies in the corner but gets caught with a Cross Rhodes for the 1…2…3.

Winner [via Pinfall]: Cody Rhodes (4:15)

  • [[Thoughts]]: Good match, especially compared with the rest of the matches that have occurred tonight. They were right to give Cara/Rhodes the longest match of the night thus far.

—–

[[2012 Slammy Awards: “#TrendingNow Hashtag of the Year”]]

Zack Ryder and Layla make their way out to present the next award. Layla talks about how the top Twitter trends are from the WWE Universe whenever WWE is on TV. Layla then reminds everyone to download the WWE App. The nominees for this award are…

-“#FeedMeMore” (Ryback)

“#PeoplePower” (John Laurinitis)

“#LittleJimmy” (R-Truth)

“#WWWYKI” (Zack Ryder)

The winner is next!

-Commercial Break-

The winner is…”#FeedMeMore“. Ryder says he’s going to give him the Slammy in the back but says “Woo woo woo!” beforehand because of reasons.

—–

[[The Big Show Addresses the WWE Universe]]

World Heavyweight Champion The Big Show makes his way to the ring, carrying his ridiculously huge novelty chair. Show drapes the belt over the chair, which comes up to his chest. Show says the WWE Universe let him down by not voting him “Superstar of the Year” but he’s not upset because he’s still the World Heavyweight Champion. Show says he did exactly what he said he was going to do. Show asks what it’s going to take to prove he’s the most dominant superstar in the WWE.

A “Boring!” chant breaks out and Show freaks out until Sheamus makes his way out to interrupt. Sheamus says he’s not here to fight Show, he’s here to say he has no regrets about their match last night. Sheamus says they beat the crap out of each other and calls it one of the most physical and painful matches of his career. Sheamus says Show was the better man last night. Show asks him what he said, and Sheamus repeats himself. Sheamus says for right now Show deserves to be World Heavyweight Champion, and he’s out here to congratulate him and shake his hand. Sheamus extends the hand and Show takes it and there they go, they shook hands. Sheamus goes to leave and Show can’t help but make fun of him, calling him a potato-eatin’ Irishman and other such things. Sheamus turns and attacks him before unloading on Show with the gigantic novelty chair. Sheamus finishes it off with a Brogue Kick to the, erm, chest. Sheamus leaves.

  • [[Thoughts]]: There is no need to keep this feud continuing but I guess they don’t have any ideas yet on how to continue on. Good mic work from Show as usual and I like how he handled the “Boring!” chants.

Dolph Ziggler runs down to the ring to cash in the Money in the Bank but John Cena runs out and stops it. Cena sends Ziggler into two different barricades before leaving. Since the bell didn’t ring he still has the briefcase though.

  • [[Thoughts]]: GoddammitgoddammitGODDAMMIT. If that’s supposed to make Cena look like a good guy they have failed miserably; Cena now looks like a spiteful baby.

—–

Apparently we’re getting a match now because out come 3MB (Heath Slater/Jinder Mahal/Drew McIntyrefor a six-man tag team match. Ricardo Rodriguez does the announcing duties for the first member of the face (?!?) team Alberto Del Rio. Del Rio’s first partner, The Miz, makes his way out next. Their partner is unknown as we go to commercial.

—–

-Commercial Break-

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Dolph Ziggler confronts Vickie Guerrero backstage about John Cena costing him the World Heavyweight Championship. He demands she do something about it but Guerrero changes the subject to AJ Lee and the match at TLC. Ziggler pleads innocence to getting her help to win, but then brings up the fact that his and Guerrero’s relationship is over. Ziggler calls her jealousy “tired, old, and just plain ugly”…just like her. Guerrero signs a match: Ziggler/AJ against Cena/Vickie! Weird.

  • [[Thoughts]]: Interesting…and weird. Just…weird. And I’m sick of the go to Guerrero insults being that she’s old and ugly. Come on.

—–

Miz/Del Rio/Rodriguez are in the ring. Miz talks about having The Brooklyn Brawler as their partner last night against 3MB. Miz says their partner tonight isn’t just awesome, he takes it to the extreme. Miz introduces their partner as…Tommy Dreamer! Out Dreamer comes, Singapore Cane in hand.

—–

[Match #7]: The Miz/Alberto Del Rio/Tommy Dreamer Vs. 3MB (Heath Slater/Jinder Mahal/Drew McIntyre)

Del Rio and McIntyre start the match off. McIntyre stomps Del Rio down in the corner. An “ECW!” chant reigns down for obvious reasons. Del Rio reverses McIntyre and hits a running knee in the corner before locking him in an armbar. Dreamer tags in and so does Slater. Slater shoves Dreamer after doing an air guitar routine. Dreamer does a mock routine then connects with a right followed by a faceslam. The other 3MB members try to get into the fray, but Miz/Del Rio toss them out. Dreamer also sends Slater to the floor. Del Rio gets a running head start and takes them out with a suicide dive. Baseball slide by Miz, followed by a top rope splash from Dreamer. This match continues after this commercial break.

-Commercial Break-

Dreamer escapes a headlock with a back suplex as we come back from break. Slater tags in but so does The Miz who mows him over with a couple of clotheslines and a backdrop. Miz hits his seated clothesline in the corner then kicks Mahal off the apron. Slater then knocks Miz off the apron. Slater distracts the ref allowing Mahal to get a cheap shot. Slater rolls to the outside and drops Miz on the barricade. Slater rolls Miz in and gets a 2-count. McIntyre tags in and connects with a snap suplex for a 1-count. McIntyre applies an armbar to wear him down. Miz gets to his feet and hits a sunset flip for a 2-count. McIntyre regroups quickly and drops Miz. Mahal tags in and hits a flying kneedrop for a 2-count. Mahal applies a reverse chinlock. Miz fights out and hits the backbreaker/neckbreaker combo. Slater tags in and rolls Miz to the center with a front chancery. McIntyre yells at the commentators to talk about the match. Miz gets close to a tag but Slater rams him into their corner.

McIntyre tags in and hits a big boot on Miz. He brings him back to 3MB’s corner and stomps him down. Slater tags in and hits a running kick to Miz’s ribs. Out comes the air guitar, expertly strummed by Slater. Miz rolls Slater up for a 2-count but gets dropped with a clothesline. Miz tries again for a tag but Slater brings him back to the 3MB corner. Mahal tags in and hits an elbow drop for a 2-count. Mahal connects with a whole lot of kneedrops and tags McIntyre back in. This match is going on far longer than I expected. McIntyre puts Miz on his shoulder, prances a bit, then drops him on his face. He goes for the pin but only gets a 2-count. McIntyre yells at Miz to make a tag then steps on his hand. Slater tags in and goes for a pin. 2-count.

Miz backdrops Slater and in comes Del Rio for the lukewarm tag. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to Slater. Del Rio sends McIntyre flying into the announce table then hits a loudkick to Slater’s head for the 1…2…Mahal breaks it up. Miz and Mahal fight to the outside. Corner enziguri from Del Rio. He goes for the Cross Arm Breaker but looks at Dreamer who wants in. Del Rio relents and tags Dreamer in, who DDT’s Slater for the 1…2…3.

Winners [via Pinfall]: The Miz/Alberto Del Rio/Tommy Dreamer (14:12)

  • [[Thoughts]]: Man the Philly crowd was all about Tommy Dreamer which I guess wasn’t surprising given the fact that it’s, erm, Philly. What was surprising, however, was how long this match went; after about 6 minutes this match outstayed its welcome and you could tell the crowd was turning on it. Hell was turning on it. I did like Del Rio’s reluctant tag to Dreamer to end the match though; he’s learning to be a nice guy!

—–

[[2012 Slammy Awards: “Newcomer of the Year”]]

Sheamus immediately comes out to present the next award. He tries to talk about The Big Show but the crowd chants “ECW!” so he mentions Tommy Dreamer. He says 3 years ago he won this award and now stands here at a 3-time World Champion. The nominees for “Newcomer of the Year” are…

-Antonio Cesaro

Brodus Clay

Damien Sandow

Ryback

The winner is…ha ha just kidding we have a commercial first!

-Commercial Break-

We’re back live and the “Newcomer of the Year” is…Ryback.

“FEED! ME! MORE!”

Out comes Ryback to accept the award which is pretty hilarious. He shakes Sheamus’ hand and takes the Slammy. He quotes Owen Hart (“enough is enough and it’s time for a change!”) and says that he is “that change”. Commence the leading of “Feed Me More” chants. He then heads to the ring for the next match. His opponent, WWE U.S. Champion Antonio Cesaro, makes his way out next. Cesaro cuts a promo as he walks down the aisle, saying the voting was rigged and he is the true Newcomer of the Year. He says he’s smarter and stronger than Ryback and unlike “Big Hungry” he is a champion.

—–

[Match #8]: Ryback Vs. *WWE U.S. Champion* Antonio Cesaro]

Cesaro immediately takes it to Ryback with European uppercuts, but Ryback takes him down with a Thesz press and smashes his head repeatedly into the mat. Cesaro fights back with a headbutt but gets dropped with a right hand. Cesaro pushes Ryback into the ropes and hits another European uppercut. Cesaro goes for a suplex, but Ryback reverses and walks around with him in position until dropping him. That was kind of awesome. Ryback buries the shoulder into Cesaro’s midsection then whips him across to another corner. Cesaro gets a knee up then deadlifts Ryback into a spinebuster slam. Cesaro goes for the Neutralizer, but Ryback counters with a back bodydrop. Ryback follows up with a spinebuster then gets ready for the lariat. Cesaro instead bails and takes his U.S. Championship. Unfortunately Ryback isn’t feeling that and he throws Cesaro back into the ring. Cesaro immediately bails once again and exits to the back.

Winner [via Countout]: Ryback (2:34)

  • [[Thoughts]]: A nice tease of a match and a good way to get out of either one taking a pinfall loss. If I was Cesaro I would’ve run too. The ref only counted to four though, so that was awkward.

—–

[[2012 Slammy Awards: “Match of the Year”]]

“Mean” Gene Okerlund makes his way out to introduce the next award, as does Ricky Steamboat and Jim Ross. One of these is not like the other one. Okerlund announce it’s the final Slammy of the night. Steamboat and Ross also put in their two cents but I promise you it’s not anything important. The nominees are…

The Undertaker Vs. Triple H in a “Hell in a Cell” (Wrestlemania 28)

John Cena Vs. Brock Lesnar (Extreme Rules 2012)

Sheamus Vs. The Big Show (Hell in a Cell 2012)

John Cena Vs. The Rock (Wrestlemania 28)

Results after the break!

-Commercial Break-

And the winner is…Undertaker/Triple H.

“TIME TO PLAY THE GAAAAAAAAAME!”

Triple H himself emerges to a loud pop. Gone is the long hair and ponytail, in is the buzzcut. A “Triple H” chant breaks out. Where was this crowd when he was trying desperately for a goodbye pop back in August? Triple H says it’s ironic that he won one in 97 for “Best Hair”. A “We Want Taker” chant all of a sudden breaks out. Triple H calls his WM 28 “magical” and puts over Taker and ref for that match Shawn Michaels. Triple H says it was the “End of an Era” and a “Thank You Hunter” chant busts out. Apparently they’re back on his side. Triple H thanks the WWE Universe in response and then answers the “million dollar question” by saying “you have not seen the last of The Undertaker!”.

  • [[Thoughts]]: I didn’t like HHH/Taker but fair enough on that I suppose. The surprise Triple H appearance was actually pretty cool and hilarious at the same time since the crowd obviously wanted Taker more than him (even though they reacted better than the last time he tried for a pop). The “We haven’t seen the last of The Undertaker” announcement was nice as well. Respect.

—–

The Shield is beating up Tommy Dreamer backstage. They ram him into a steel garage door while Rollins says “THIS IS THE SHIELD’S HOUSE!” Ricardo Rodriguez shows up to defend Dreamer’s honor so they send him into the garage door. Officials yell at The Shield, who exit through a nearby door.

  • [[Thoughts]]: Since when did Ricardo become the defender of everyone?

—–

AJ Lee makes her way out for the main event. She has officials bring a ladder into the ring. She scales it, mic in hand, as we go to commercial.

—–

-Commercial Break-

—–

AJ Lee is still on top of the ladder as her song still plays. Finally it dies down and she stares at the Philly crowd. Lee says everyone keeps asking her why she betrayed John Cena at TLC. A “Jump!” chant breaks out. Classy. She names off random people, gas station attendants and such, who have asked her “why?”. Lee says she thought the answer was obvious but before she can say why out comes Vickie Guerrero. Guerrero says no one cares why she did it and says she wants to drag Lee’s scrawny butt all around this ring once again.

“I’m here to show the world!”

Dolph Ziggler, Lee’s partner, makes his way out. He looks perturbed about this whole situation as he walks to the ring. We see the Ziggler/Lee kiss from earlier in the show. “My Time is Now” hits and out comes John Cena. He points out a “Ziggler’s Better” sign behind him then runs to the ring.

—–

[Main Event]: John Cena/Vickie Guerrero Vs. Dolph Ziggler/AJ Lee

Cena and Ziggler start the match off. The “Ziggler’s better” chant begins. Ziggler ducks a lockup attempt then struts in admiration of himself. Single leg takedown by Cena into a quick pinfall attempt. Cena applies a front chancery which Ziggler reverses into a hammerlock. Cena reverses into a back suplex, and Ziggler tags out to Lee. Lee stares him down while smiling. Guerrero comes out of nowhere and jumps Lee. They roll around the ring in typical catfight fashion until Lee rolls out of the ring. Lee abandons Ziggler and exits to the back, so Ziggler takes it to Cena. Ziggler and Guerrero look at each other, and Guerrero also abandons the match. Cena sidesteps a corner splash and attempts an Attitude Adjustment but Ziggler wiggles out and connects with a DDT for a 2-count. Ziggler hits 7 elbowdrops in rapid fashion but Cena ducks the Superkick and locks on the STF. Ziggler crawls his way to the ropes. Lee reemerges out of nowhere with Big E Langston causing the match to be thrown out.

Winners [via DQ]: John Cena/Vickie Guerrero (4:25)

  • [[Thoughts]]: Big E Langston! BIG E F*CKIN’ LANGSTON! Awesome. This match was okay and everything, or whatever, BUT BIG E F*CKIN’ LANGSTON! YES!!!!

—–

[Post-Match]: Big E Langston drops John Cena with the Big End and stands over Cena’s body as AJ Lee skips around the carnage. Fade to logo.

  • [[Thoughts]]: This is so out of left field but I love it. Big E Langston has been killing it in NXT and it’s awesome that he’s shown up. What does all of this mean? I have no idea. I’m still chanting “FIVE!” repeatedly.

*****

Overall Show Thoughts:

  • Overall it was a show that felt long as hell; The Slammys once again felt pointless and although they led into some interesting things (Ric Flair brawling with The Shield for one), it took its toll on the wrestling itself. Not to mention the awkward commercial cuts and the endless reminders of how the WWE App works. But oh man were there some memorable moments and the end of the show was so out of left field that I can’t help but be happy. On one hand I wasn’t a fan for most of the show but on the other…BIG E F*CKIN’ LANGSTON.
  • Best Match: Sin Cara Vs. Cody Rhodes (that’s a gun to the head choice; none of these matches were great)
  • Worst Match: The Great Khali Vs. David Otunga
  • Best Moments: Ric Flair putting Paul Heyman in the Figure Four, Ryback/Team Hell No/Flair/The Shield brawl, Big E Langston making his WWE debut in surprising fashion, Triple H announcing that The Undertaker was not finished yet.
  • Worst Moments: The Slammy Awards themselves, the constant reminders of how to use the WWE App and where to get it, watching Natalya dance with The Great Khali.

—–

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