[Flashback PPV Recap] WCW Beach Blast 1992

Date: June 20, 1992

Location: Mobile, Alabama (Mobile Civic Center)

Commentators: Jim Ross/Jesse “The Body” Ventura

Complete Card for WCW Beach Blast 1992:

  • Falls Count Anywhere: Sting (c) Vs. Cactus Jack for the WCW World Heavyweight Title
  • 30 Minute Non-Title Iron Man Challenge: Rick Rude  Vs. Ricky Steamboat
  • Bikini Contest: Missy Hyatt Vs. Madusa
  • The Steiner Brothers (Rick/Scott Steiner) (c) Vs. The Miracle Violence Connection (Steve Williams/Terry Gordy) for the WCW World Tag Team Titles
  • Ron Simmons Vs. “The Taylor Made Man” Terry Taylor
  • Dustin Rhodes/Barry Windham/Nikita Koloff Vs. The Dangerous Alliance (Steve Austin/Bobby Eaton/Arn Anderson)
  • Brian Pillman (c) Vs. Scotty Flamingo for the WCW Light Heavyweight Title
  • Marcus Bagwell Vs. Greg “the Hammer” Valentine

An opening video quickly runs down the card for Beach Blast 1992.

We are live at the Mobile Civic Center in Mobile, Alabama. Tony Schiavone welcomes the home audience while fireworks go off inside of the arena. We pan down to Schiavone and Eric Bischoff who are standing in front of the crowd. They run down the big matches tonight, the bring in Bill Watts who was running WCW at the time. Watts lays down the format: starting with the Light Heavyweight Title match and ending with the Tag Team Title match (wait, what?). Watts puts over light heavyweights and the Iron Man Challenge between Rude/Steamboat. Watts announces that Rude’s managers Paul E. Dangerously and Madusa will be banned from ringside for that match. Watts then puts over the Falls Count Anywhere match and tries to end with a terrible catchphrase I won’t repeat.

Schiavone hands it over to our commentator area where Jim Ross (sans cowboy hat but wearing an awesome Hawaiian shirt) continues to put over the upcoming event. Cut to the Beach Blast stage where Ross’ broadcast partner Jesse Ventura is sitting on a beach chair surrounded by lovely bikini-clad ladies (it’s a beach setting, in case you couldn’t tell by the name). Pyro continues to go off as he walks with the ladies to the ring. So that’s how they got him to stay on for so long. Ventura heads to the booth to do his job.

Match #1: “Flyin'” Brian Pillman (c) Vs. Scotty Flamingo for the WCW Light Heavyweight Title

Pillman and Flamingo lock up and walk around the ring, but it breaks with no one taking advantage. Flamingo gets a quick leg takedown and gloats for a minute. Flamingo and Pillman trade waistlocks and armlocks. Pillman gets a drop toe-hold and puts Flamingo in a hammerlock, slamming his knees into Flamingo’s left arm for added oomph. Flamingo bridges out of a series of two-counts. Flamingo grabs the ropes to break the hammerlock.

Another tie-up and Flamingo pushes him to the ropes. He does not break cleanly. Pillman ducks a clothesline and gets a crucifix for a 2-count. Pillman goes to hit him and Flamingo begs off into the corner. Pillman gets another hammerlock and Flamingo backs him into the corner. Pillman blocks an elbow but gets one in the gut. Pillman jumps out of the corner and hip-tosses Flamingo to the mat. Pillman applies an arm scissor and transitions into an armlock. Flamingo rolls him up for a pin attempt but Pillman rolls out and regains the leverage. Pillman transitions into an armbar. They get to their feet and Flamingo whips him into the corner. Pillman shoulderblocks him to the ground and hits a hip-lock takedown.

Another lockup, another wristlock by Pillman. Pillman wrenches on the arm and twists it, sending Flamingo to the ground. Flamingo tries to escape but Pillman takes him back down. Flamingo tries to counter into a headlock but Pillman slips out and applies a hammerlock/chinlock combo. Flamingo backs Pillman into the corner and gets the ref to break the hold. Flamingo rakes Pillman’s eyes in and hits a right hand. Flamingo goes for a side slam but Pillman counters with a head scissors. Pillman dropkicks him through the second rope and Flamingo gets hung up on the ropes. Pillman kicks him off and Flamingo goes head first into concrete. Pillman hits a double axe-handle from the apron.

Back in the ring Pillman tries to go off the top but the ref warns him it’ll be a DQ. This distraction allows Flamingo to throw him from the top and onto the canvas. Flamingo goes for the pin but only gets a 2. Flamingo throws him to the outside, and jumps over the top rope and onto Pillman (and that’s not a DQ?). Flamingo rolls Pillman back in who starts fighting back. The two trade blows, until Flamingo wrenches Pillman’s face to stop the momentum. Snap mare by Flamingo followed by a fist-drop from the second rope. Flamingo goes for the pin and gets another 2-count.

Pillman rolls to the apron. Flamingo drapes him over the top and hits a couple of forearms. Flamingo gets a running start but Pillman launches himself into Flamingo and gets a 2-count. Flamingo hits a massive clothesline and goes for a pin, but Pillman reverses it into a pin of his own for a 2-count. Chinlock applied by Flamingo to wear Pillman down. Flamingo uses the ropes for leverage like a good heel should. Flamingo goes for the pin; 2-count. Flamingo reapplies the reverse chinlock. They get to their feet, and Pillman starts fighting back and Flamingo accidentally launches himself right into the turnbuckles. Flamingo goes right back on the offensive and applies another reverse chinlock. Flamingo starts choking Pillman out of frustration.

Pillman reverses an Irish whip and catches Flamingo in a sleeperhold. Flamingo sends him face-first into the top turnbuckle to break the hold. Both men get up and punch one another at the same time, sending both falling to the mat. They get to their knees and start hammering at each other. Flamingo rakes Pillman’s eyes to stop him, and Pillman chokes him in response. Another eye rake puts an end to that. Flamingo tries to hit an axehandle from the second rope but Pillman catches him with a dropkick. The two start trading forearms, and Pillman comes off the ropes with a spinning savate (heel) kick. Pillman throws Flamingo face-first into the turnbuckles, followed by a chop, and a series of punches while perched on the second rope.

Flamingo counters the Irish whip but gets a boot to the face. Pillman rushes him but Flamingo heads a nice powerslam for the 1…2…KICK OUT. Flamingo tries to pick Pillman up but he can’t stand. Flamingo slaps him in the face, then goes on the second turnbuckle to gloat. Pillman hits a belly to back suplex from the second rope and goes for the pin. 1…2…Flamingo gets his foot on the rope. Pillman lands a very loud chop and slams him face-first into the mat. Flamingo goes chest first into the corner and Pillman clotheslines him from behind. Pillman clotheslines him over the top and onto the entrance ramp. Pillman jumps over the top rope but Flamingo moves and Pillman goes head-first into the ramp.

Pillman crawls back in and Flamingo hits a knee from the second rope. He goes for the pin. 1…2…3! New champ!

Winner and NEW Light Heavyweight Champion [via Pinfall]: Scotty Flamingo (17:27)

  • A damn good match to start off the show. It was a little jarring to see light heavyweights actually wrestle instead of executing high spot after high spot (I grew up in the 90’s, sue me), but as far as the wrestling went it was very sound. Flamingo was especially impressive and played the chickensh*t heel well. He hung in there with Pillman far better than anyone probably expected. All in all a wonderful way to start off the PPV. Rare to get a “Match of the Night” contender this early. (B+)

Back at the announce table, Ventura takes offense at the fact that Johnny B. Badd will be the MC of the Bikini Contest, saying it should be him.

Bikini Contest Round 1: Missy Hyatt Vs. Madusa (Evening Gowns)

Johnny B. Badd makes his way out in a ridiculous tuxedo, complete with boa. He shoots the Badd Blaster at the crowd alongside the entrance ramp. He walks back over to the Beach Blast entrance area, decked out to look like a beach. He grabs the mic and talks about being a “Badd Man!”. He explains the rules: each woman will come out three times (1st time in an evening gown for some reason, 2nd in a bathing suit, and 3rd in a teeny weeny bikini). Badd says the people at home can vote via the Hotline number while the crowd at home can dictate who wins by their cheers.

Look having me recap it in text form is not going to be exciting for you, so let’s just get this over with: Hyatt wears a normal evening gown, Madusa is in a wedding dress complete with veil. That’s it for Round 1, I guess they’re doing it in segments.

Schiavone and Bischoff hype up Ron Simmons getting a key to the city of Tallahassee, FL (he’s a college football legend in the state) then take us to the next match which features, you guessed it, Ron Simmons!

Match #2: Ron Simmons Vs. “The Taylor Made Man” Terry Taylor

Simmons and Taylor lock up and Simmons quickly sends him to the mat. Taylor trash talks him, and Simmons corners him but the ref breaks it up. Another lockup, and Taylor tries to hip toss Simmons out of the corner. Simmons is too strong and reverses it into a hip toss of his own. Taylor forces Simmons into the corner once again and gets a knee to the gut followed by a series of right hands. Taylor gloats and Simmons gets into the three-point stance. He hits a series of tackles, but Taylor throws Simmons to the ramp. Taylor follows and Simmons picks him up and press-slams him back into the ring. Simmons then clotheslines Taylor back to the floor.

Back in the ring, Simmons delivers a bodyslam followed by a series of forearms to the back and a headbutt. Simmons whips Taylor into opposite corners and applies a bearhug. Taylor pokes Simmons in the eyes to get out of the submission. Simmons reverses another hip toss attempt and goes for the football tackle but Taylor moves and he spills onto the entrance ramp. Taylor goes out to meet him and slams him face-first into the ramp before throwing him back in. Taylor hits a jawbreaker and a right hand. A brief comeback is stopped via eye rake. Taylor hits a “Mr. Perfect” snapmare and goes for the pin. 2-count. Taylor locks on a reverse chinlock.

Taylor hits a backbreaker and goes for the pin but only gets a 2-count. Simmons gets an elbow to Taylor’s gut but Taylor quickly fights back. Simmons reverses an Irish whip and hits a spinebuster. Simmons picks Taylor up by his throat and drops him to the mat. Simmons continues his comeback with a massive backdrop followed up by a shoulderblock. Taylor leapfrogs another backdrop attempt but is met with a massive Powerslam when coming off the ropes for the 1…2…3!

Winner [via Pinfall]: Ron Simmons (7:09)

  • Well that was certainly no Pillman/Flamingo but a decent if boring match in its own right. Essentially a showcase for Simmons, whom Watts was very high on and would eventually push to the moon. Taylor deserves some credit for making Simmons look good as well. (C)

Ross interviews Simmons at ringside. Ross brings up his feud with The Super Invader and Harley Race very briefly. Simmons says his goal is to be the best he can be. Simmons says he’s living proof that anyone can beat the odds, no matter their race or socioeconomic status. Simmons says he’s going to be World Champ. I’m sure people in 1992 thought that was a ludicrous proclamation. Back to the ring for the next match!

Match #3: Marcus Bagwell Vs. Greg “The Hammer” Valentine

Bagwell gets a headlock out of a lockup and reverses a hip toss. He follows it up with an armdrag takedown and a bodyslam. Bagwell plays to the crowd, who are not too hot on him (the males at least aren’t). Valentine backs Bagwell into the ropes and delivers knees into his gut. Bagwell whips Valentine into the ropes and goes for a backdrop but Valentine hits him with elbows. Valentine goes for a piledriver, but Bagwell backdrops him instead. Bagwell goes for a single leg takedown but Valentine gets out. Bagwell hits an atomic drop followed by a couple of dropkicks. This causes Valentine to leave the ring to get himself together.

The two lock up and Valentine blocks a hip toss attempt, hitting a forearm to the chest to knock him to the mat. Valentine chops Bagwell four times and drives his elbow into the back of Bagwell’s neck. A backbreaker by Valentine, who then heads to the second rope. He goes for an elbow but Bagwell moves out of the way. Bagwell delivers a bodyslam and goes for a kneedrop, but Valentine moves out of the way. Valentine starts working on Bagwell’s left knee in preparation for his finisher.

Valentine snap mares Bagwell to the ground and continues working on his knee. Valentine slaps Bagwell then signals for the Figure Four. He goes to apply it but Bagwell kicks him off. Valentine goes for it again but Bagwell rolls him up for the 1…2…KICK OUT. Valentine snap mares him back to the ground but Bagwell reverses a bodyslam attempt into a quick pinning combo for a 2-count. Bagwell goes for a backslide, getting another 2-count. Bagwell blocks a suplex and delivers one of his own for the 2-count.

Valentine starts begging off and pokes Bagwell in the eye. That doesn’t stop Bagwell, who gives Valentine a back body drop. Bagwell throws Valentine into the ropes and leapfrogs him, but he lands wrong on the left knee stopping his momentum. Valentine lands an atomic drop knee first, and applies the Figure Four. After a brief fight, he finally gives up.

Winner [via Submission]: Greg “The Hammer” Valentine (7:17)

  • Bagwell’s inexperience was very very obvious but Valentine still carried him to a watchable match. Unfortunately outside of the minor drama of Bagwell’s hurt knee, there wasn’t much to invest in here. A filler match but a decent filler match. (C)

We see a recap of Cactus Jack‘s Falls Count Anywhere match against  Van Hammer on a recent edition of Clash of the Champions which he competed in to prepare for his match against Sting. The match, THE WORLD FREAKIN’ TITLE MATCH, is up next. What is this, WWE?

Cactus Jack comes out and waits for Sting on the entrance ramp.

Match #4 [Falls Count Anywhere Match]: Sting (c) Vs. Cactus Jack for the WCW World Heavyweight Title

Sting and Jack start fighting immediately on the entrance ramp. Jack tries to hip toss Sting to the floor but Sting reverses into a backslide for a 2-count. Sting backdrops Jack on the ramp and then smashes him face-first back into the ramp. Sting goes for another pin but only gets a 2-count. Sting measures him for a Stinger Splash but Jack moves and he hits the ropes instead. Sting rolls in and then to the floor. Jack hits the Nestea Plunge elbow to the floor onto Sting. He goes for the pin. 1…2…KICK OUT.

Jack hits a swinging neckbreaker on Sting, sending him into the concrete. Jack goes for the pin. 2-count. Jack gets back up to the apron and hits a sunset flip for the 1…2…KICK OUT (awesome move). Sting blocks Jack from smashing him into the ringside barrier, and sends Jack face-first into the barrier instead. Sting continues to do so but Jack hits him to stop the onslaught, throwing him into the barrier. Jack rushes at him, but Sting backdrops him over the railing and onto the floor. The two take the fight to the first few rows. Sting suplexes him onto the concrete and goes for the pin. 2-count.

Sting sends Jack into the barrier, and Jack over and back ringside. They get into the ring. Sting blocks a kick but Jack spins around and hits a clothesline. Jack sends Sting head-first into the turnbuckle. Jack splashes Sting knee-first in the corner, then goes for a reverse chinlock/bodyscissors combo (there’s an MMA name for it, I think). The move turns into a body scissors, and Jack slaps him. That wakes Sting up who breaks out of it and hits Jack with a series of right hands.

Jack rakes Sting’s eyes and clotheslines the both of them over the top rope and onto the floor. Jack whips Sting into the barrier. Sting kicks him away, and clotheslines him. Jack drills Sting in the sternum with a chair and smashes it over his back many times over. Jack grabs Sting who back suplexes him onto the concrete floor. Sting goes for the pin but only gets a 2-count. They both punch each other and fall to the ground. Jack gets a 2-count, then Sting gets a 2-count.

Sting goes for the Stinger Splash but Jack catches him and drops him into the barrier. An attempted piledriver goes badly and Ross and Ventura try to cover it up. Jack goes to the top rope and tries for an axehandle, but misses and the force on the concrete goes all on his knees. They fight to the entrance ramp again and Sting bodyslams him on it. Sting grabs a chair and cracks him over the back repeatedly, his last shot right into Jack’s injured knee. Sting tries for the Scorpion Death Lock, but Jack rolls out and they both spill to the floor.

They get right back on the ramp and Jack hits the Double Arm DDT and goes for the pin. 1…2…KICK OUT. Jack limps back towards the ring and Sting hits a running clothesline. Sting goes to the top rope and hits a clothesline for the 1…2…3!

Winner and STILL World Heavyweight Champion [via Pinfall]: Sting (11:22)

  • A very good brawl, hard-hitting and pretty brutal despite the lack of blood that I’ve come to expect growing up as a 90’s wrestling fan. Jack took some sick bumps on the concrete that had me wincing and audibly yelling “JESUS” (especially the backdrop into the crowd). It’s easy to see why Jack called it one of his greatest matches; he and Sting had tremendous chemistry together and could’ve done even more had they been given the time. Unfortunately though it was fourth on the card. A WORLD TITLE MATCH was FOURTH on the card. Sorry to keep harping on that, but it’s ridiculous.  This would’ve made for a great headliner, giving Beach Blast 1992 great bookends. Oh well. (B)

We go to Tony Schiavone and Eric Bischoff, who talk about Sting’s win and put over Sting’s toughness by accepting such a tough challenge. They then move onto the next match: Rick Rude Vs. Ricky Steamboat in a 30 Minute Ironman Challenge. Bischoff thinks Steamboat has the advantage because he’s the lighter of the two.

U.S. Champ Rick Rude comes out and does his usual “mock the crowd then pose” schtick. It doesn’t work as well with his WCW music; it’s too upbeat and 80’s (which is all sorts of ironic). Apparently this match is non-title which I didn’t know until Ross and Ventura brought it up. It begs this question: WHY THE HELL IS THE TITLE NOT ON THE LINE?!?

Ricky Steamboat comes out next with wife and kid in tow for cheap babyface likability. If you can’t tell the fact that he came out with his family annoys the crap out of me. It just seemed so…unnecessary, not to mention cheap as mentioned earlier.

Match #5 [30 Minute Non-Title Iron Man Challenge]: Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat Vs. [WCW U.S. Champion] “Ravishing” Rick Rude

Steamboat starts his attack early, ending with a gutbuster. Steamboat takes his ring gear off and hits a running tackle right into Rude’s ribs in the corner. Steamboat throws Rude face-first into the mat and follows it up with a chop and a kick to the ribs. Steamboat continues to work Rude’s ribs. Steamboat blocks a hip toss attempt and continues attacking his ribs (apparently injured during the gutbuster). Steamboat applies a side bearhug, digging his shoulder into Rude’s “injured” ribs.

Steamboat drives Rude into the corner and hits another couple of shoulder blocks. Rude catches Steamboat with a knee lift on the third shoulder block attempt. Steamboat ducks a clothesline and slams him to the mat. Steamboat applies a bow and arrow-ish, his knee digging into Rude’s ribs. Rude rakes the eyes to get out of the painful move and tries for a monkey flip but Steamboat blocks it and applies the Boston Crab. After what feels like forever, Rude finally makes it to the ropes.

Steamboat hits a splash on Rude’s back, and drives his right knee some more into his ribs. Steamboat gets a running start and hits another knee into Rude’s back/ribs. Steamboat begs Rude to get up and continues the rib assault with forearms and knees. Steamboat hits a face-first suplex and follows it with a karate chop to the head. Steamboat goes for the cover, but only gets a 2-count. Steamboat whips Rude into the corner, but Rude gets his knees up during a splash attempt. Rude goes for the pin. 1…2…3! Rude gets ahead.

-Rude: 1 Steamboat: 0-

Rude quickly continues the assault and hits a quick Rude Awakening. 1…2…3! He’s got another fall!

-Rude: 2 Steamboat: 0-

Rude hits a backbreaker and heads to the top rope. He drops a knee onto Steamboat’s throat. However since top rope moves are banned in WCW, that gets Rude disqualified!

-Rude: 2/Steamboat: 1-

Rude picks Steamboat up and rolls him up. 1…2…3! Another fall for Rude.

-Rude: 3/Steamboat: 1-

Steamboat begins to fight back with shots to the ribs. Steamboat attempts a backdrop but Rude slams him face-first into the mat. Snap mare by Rude, followed by Rude’s variation of the Camel Clutch (you’d know if you’ve seen it). Steamboat gets near the ropes but Rude stops him. He goes to shake and shimmy to gloat, but his ribs prevent it from happening. Rude reapplies the Camel Clutch (minus the legs over his knees). Steamboat stands with Rude on his shoulders and hits an Electric Chair, knocking both men to the mat.

Steamboat hits the ropes and goes for a splash but Rude gets the knees up. Rude hits a swinging neckbreaker and goes for a cover. 2-count. Rude tries again. 2-count. Rude tries for a third time. 2-count. Steamboat gets to his feet and starts fighting back with a series of chops that send Rude into the corner. Rude kicks Steamboat in the gut and snap mares him to the mat. Rude applies the rear chinlock in the center of the ring. Steamboat gets to his feet and escapes but Rude catches him right in the breadbasket with a knee.

Rude slams Steamboat head-first into the turnbuckle and rakes the eyes. Rude connects with a piledriver and goes for the pin. 1…2…kick out. Rude yells at the ref. Rude sets Steamboat for a Tombstone Piledriver, but Steamboat reverses it and hits one of his own. 1…2…3!

Rude: 3/Steamboat: 2-

Rude pulls Steamboat face-first into the second turnbuckle. Rude goes to the top again (HEH?) but Steamboat meets him at the top and hits a Superplex from the time. Steamboat is too spent to quickly make the pin. Steamboat gets to his feet, staggers, then goes for the pin. 1…2…emphatic kick out. Steamboat misses a clothesline but the two end up clotheslining each other on the next go around. Both men are down. Rude goes for the pin, but Steamboat bridges at 2 and goes for a backslide. 1…2…3! It is tied!

-Rude: 3/Steamboat: 3-

Steamboat tries a series of pinning maneuvers, but comes up short each time. Rude delivers a Jawbreaker to stop the momentum. 9 minutes left in the contest and both men are down. Rude drives Steamboat face-first into the canvas three times and goes for the pin. 1…2…kick out! Rude bodyslams him and hits a forearm smash. 1…2…kick out! Steamboat will not stay down.

Steamboat hits a series of chops on Rude, the sweat flying from both men. Rude rakes the eyes once again to stop the momentum. Rude hits a short-arm clothesline and shows off his right bicep to the crowd. Rude chops Steamboat in the throat and Steamboat goes down like a stack of bricks. Rude chokes Steamboat on the second rope. Rude lays it in with a series of forearms to Steamboat’s skull. Rude starts going for the Rude Awakening but Steamboat separates the hands, ducks a clothesline, and hits Rude with the Rude Awakening! Steamboat goes for the pin. 1…2…KICK OUT!

Steamboat springs off of the ropes and delivers a series of knees to Rude’s chest. A suplex by Steamboat followed by a cover. 1…2…kick out! 4 and a half minutes remaining. Steamboat hits a back suplex and goes for another pin. 1…2…another kick out. Rude reverses and Irish whip and applies a sleeper. Steamboat drives Rude’s head into the turnbuckles but Rude continues to hang on. Steamboat starts fading and tries lifting his arm to grab the rope but Rude kicks the arm back down (that’s actually pretty brilliant). 2 minutes remaining.

Steamboat is now fully on the mat as Rude continues to wrench the sleeperhold. The ref checks Steamboat’s eyes. 1 minute remaining! Steamboat uses the turnbuckles to flip himself onto Rude for the 1…2…3! 30 seconds remain.

Rude: 3/Steamboat: 4-

Rude desperately goes for a series of pins to tie it up again but cannot keep Steamboat down. 5…4…3…2…1…time’s up!

Winner [4 Falls to 3]: Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat (30:00)

  • If anyone doubts Rick Rude’s in-ring ability, point them towards this match. This is one of, if not the, best Rude match I have ever seen. Granted he had a hell of a man working with him in Steamboat but he absolutely stole the show in every respect. Just a really great match with a ton of dramatic near-falls and a lot of drama (heightened by the excellent work by Ross and Ventura on commentary). The “injured ribs” of Rude was a bit weak in the psychology department but outside of that I was completely and totally enamored for the entire 30 minutes. Just great, great work. (A-)

Bikini Contest Round 2: Missy Hyatt Vs. Madusa (Bathing Suits)

Johnny B. Badd is back out to MC the next round in the contest. He says he’s so outrageous that he’s contagious (not necessarily worth bragging about). Madusa comes out wearing a leather jacket over her bathing suit and high heels (that’s not practical, girrrrrrlfriend). She takes the jacket off and whips it around a little bit. Hyatt comes out next in a bikini, which is funny since the next round is the bikini round. Badd makes that lame “I’m talking about eyes, not tits” joke everyone makes. Badd says there’s another portion to come: the itsy bitsy teeny weeny bikini. I guess that’s different from a normal bikini. Badd transitions it back to the ring.

  • …kay.

Match #6 [Six Man Tag Team Match; Special Referee: Ole Anderson]: “The Natural” Dustin Rhodes/Barry Windham/Nikita Koloff Vs. The Dangerous Alliance (“Stunning” Steve Austin/”Beautiful” Bobby Eaton/”The Enforcer” Arn Anderson) [w/ Paul E. Dangerously]

Windham and Austin start off. They go back and forth, and Austin gets the advantage with a series of forearm blows to the back. Austin goes to the second rope and Windham catches him. Windham delivers a Japanese Arm Drag off the the second turnbuckle (cool!). Rhodes tags in and hits a dropkick on Austin, followed by a standing dropkick. Rhodes catches Austin in an armbar, who tags out while caught in the move.

In comes Eaton, who gets caught in a side headlock courtesy of Rhodes. Rhodes reverses an Irish whip and rushes in but Eaton slips behind and goes for a roll-up for a 2-count. In comes Anderson to face Rhodes. He mouths off to Koloff on the outside and slaps him. Rhodes tags him in and Anderson dares him to face him while in his corner. It doesn’t work. Anderson gets a kick boot to the gut and a kneedrop. He goes to the top but Ole stops him. Ross tries to put over these new rules and that the sports writers “don’t get it”.

Koloff and Anderson tie-up. Anderson puts him against the ropes and delivers some shoulder blocks into the mid-section. Koloff clotheslines Anderson over the top rope which should be a DQ but since he didn’t “throw” him it doesn’t count. Okay. Eaton tags in and locks up with Koloff. Eaton backs him into the ropes and hits a series of blows. Koloff reverses an Irish whip and puts Eaton in a bearhug. Anderson breaks him out and he and Eaton go for a double team move. Koloff escapes it and takes out all three men. All three members of The Dangerous Alliance leave the ring and Paul E. tells them to go with “Plan #2”.

Eaton gets back into the ring to tag Anderson in. A headlock by Koloff and a tag to Windham. Windham bodyslams Anderson. Anderson fights back but gets his whip reversed. Anderson gets an atomic drop, which sends him into the turnbuckles. But he ends up catching Windham in the face with the back of his head, knocking both down. Anderson hits a fist from the second turnbuckle. Anderson attacks Windham in the corner and rushes in but Windham gets the knee up. Windham applies a sleeperhold. Anderson hits a back suplex to escape.

Windham, however, gets the tag to Rhodes. Rhodes hits Anderson with a lariat, and attacks the other two members. Anderson throws Rhodes into Eaton, and their heads collide. Austin tags in and chokes Rhodes on the second rope. Austin distracts Ole, which allows Anderson to get some cheap shots. Anderson tags back in and snap mares Rhodes to the mat. Anderson plants his boot into the back of Rhodes’ head continually, followed by a knee to the back.

Anderson tries another snap mare, but Rhodes gets a backslide. 1…2…Eaton breaks it up. Eaton tags in and goes to smash his knee into the ringpost but Paul E. stops him from doing so in fear of a DQ. Eaton gets him back in the ring and goes for the pin. 1…2…kick out! Eaton applies an armbar while digging his palm into Rhodes’ face. Austin tags in and Rhodes starts fighting back. Austin ducks a clothesline and hits a running clothesline of his own. 1…2…kick out (despite the fact Ole hit the mat three times)!

Anderson tags back in and he rubs his forearm in Rhodes’ face. Rhodes blocks a left hook and hits a Bionic Elbow. Eaton tags in and prevents Rhodes from making the tag. Eaton hits an armbar takedown and locks in a hammerlock on the mat.  Rhodes misses a cross body attempt and falls to the mat. Austin tags in but Rhodes gets a roll-up for the 1…2…kick out! Austin tags in Anderson who applies an armbar to continue working on Rhodes’ arm.

Rhodes gets to his feet and throws Anderson into Eaton. Austin tags in and prevents Rhodes from making the tag. Austin hits the Stun Gun, but before he can go for the pin, Rhodes tags Windham in. Windham cleans house, and soon enough all six men end up in the ring. Windham hits the Superplex behind Ole’s back and goes for the pin. Anderson  comes off the top to break the count, which Ole sees. Anderson is disqualified and loses the match for his team.

Winners [via Disqualification]: Dustin Rhodes/Barry Windham/Nikita Koloff (15:32)

We cut to Bischoff, who’s with Ricky Steamboat. Steamboat thanks the fans for standing by him and tonight was the hardest match of his entire career (right). Steamboat says he’s going to be challenging Rude for the U.S. Title. Paul E. Dangerously comes in and puts him over for a great match. However, Paul E. says he has received his last U.S. Title shot ever. Cactus Jack pulls him off of the interview stage and the two start trading blows back and forth. Security and refs come out to break the two up but don’t have much luck. They brawl to the back.

Ross explains the storyline (Jack was hired to take Steamboat out for The Dangerous Alliance) to the home audience just in case they didn’t get what happened and then hands it over to Ventura.

Bikini Contest Round 3: Missy Hyatt Vs. Madusa (Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Bikinis)

Ventura is on stage co-MC the next round of the contest. Badd comes out in a ridiculous “cowboy” outfit and you can see the “WTF” look on Ventura’s face. Ventura asks him point blank if he likes girls, and Badd ducks the question. Madusa comes out first and Ventura is all (audible) giggles as she walks by. Ventura proclaims this contest as over. Hyatt is still in the changing room and says someone stole her bathing suit (which was in an envelope). Hyatt steals Ventura’s scarves and comes out wearing them as her bikini. Badd announces Hyatt as the winner of the contest. Madusa pushes Badd into the changing tent and we hear shrieking. He comes out with the bottom part of her bikini. Ventura then goes in, apparently to have sex with her. Ew.

Winner: Missy Hyatt (I guess?)

  • All in all a pointless but harmless diversion in between the matches. But to be fair I’m 21 years removed from the first time this event aired; I’m sure people back then were hooting and hollering but I live in the age of the internet and I have seen much much sexier (and nakeder, which is a real world because shut your face). They needed to fill time somehow I guess.

We go back to Schiavone/Bischoff, who talk about Cactus Jack’s attack on Ricky Steamboat from earlier. They then hype up our main event: Steiner Brothers/Miracle Violence Connection for the WCW World Tag Team Titles. I was initially flabbergasted that this match took main event honors until I remembered Bill Watts’ obsession with “Dr. Death” Steve Williams back in the Mid-South days. Makes sense.

Main Event: The Steiner Brothers [Rick Steiner/Scott Steiner] (c) Vs. The Miracle Violence Connection [“Dr. Death” Steve Williams/Terry “Bamm Bamm” Gordy] for the WCW World Tag Team Titles

Scott Steiner and Terry Gordy start off. Their first lockup results in a stalemate, but the second results in a waistlock takedown by Gordy. Scott reverses and goes for a quick pin for a 2-count. Gordy hits the ropes to get Scott off of him. Scott gets a single leg takedown and transitions into a half-nelson. Gordy hits the ropes to escape the maneuver. Scott gets a headlock but Gordy quickly pushes him off.

Scott tries to knock him down with a shoulder block but Gordy doesn’t move. Gordy slaps him, they trade blows, and Scott takes him down and starts wailing on him. The ref breaks them up as best as he can and they separate into opposite corners. Gordy tags in Williams. Scott and Williams get into a little amateur wrestling skirmish, reversing each other’s holds, until Williams gets into the ropes to stop it. Scott applies a headlock and Williams puts him in the corner. He hits a knee and whips him into the corner, but Scott gets his foot up. Williams charges him and Scott moves. Scott tries for a waistlock suplex but Williams gives him an elbow. Williams tries again for a rush in the corner, but Scott moves and gets a sunset flip for a 2-count.

Scott applies a side headlock takedown on Williams and Rick tags in. Rick tries for an armdrag, but Williams blocks it. Rick tries again but Williams hooks the arm to block it. They end up in the corner and the ref calls for a clean break which both men begrudgingly do. Rick hits a belly to belly suplex, and Williams rolls out to the floor and regroup.

Back in the ring, Williams gets a couple of forearms and slams Rick to the mat. Williams takes him down with a 3 point stance twice, but on his third attempt, Rick hits the Steinerline for a 2-count. Williams forces Rick into his corner and Gordy tags in. Gordy whips Rick into the ropes, but Rick moves out of the way of an attempted elbow. Gordy hits a belly to back suplex and goes for the pin. 2-count. Rick hits a belly to back of his own and Williams tags back in.

Rick blocks a punch and lands a few of their own. Williams tosses Rick through the ropes and onto the entrance ramp. Williams hits a shoulder block through the ropes to keep him outside. Rick launches over the top rope and goes for a sunset flip. Williams holds the ropes, but Scott kicks him off for the pinfall attempt. 2-count. Gordy tags in and applies a modified half-Boston Crab. Rick, still caught in the hold, moves his way to the top and gets a series of near-falls but Williams hits him to stop the momentum.

Gordy applies a spinning toehold on Rick, but Rick kicks him and hits a belly to belly suplex. Scott tags in and hits a belly to belly-ish suplex of his own for a 2-count. A submission battle starts on the ground, and Scott almost applies a bow and arrow but Gordy fights out. Gordy rolls to Williams and gets a tag mid-pin attempt (kind of a botch). Williams starts putting the hurt on Scott. Scott prevents getting thrown face-first into the top turnbuckle and tries for a belly to belly, but Williams prevents it and they end up in the ropes.

Williams snap mares Scott to the ground and applies a reverse chinlock. He lets go and Gordy tags back in. Scott ducks a clothesline and hits a cross-body for a 2-count. Back and forth battle between the two, until Gordy grabs Scott’s arms. This allows Williams to deliver a series of chops and a kick to Scott’s knee while the ref’s back is turned. Gordy takes the targeted knee and applies a half-STF (just the leglock, no face-lock) to continue the hurt.

Gordy hits a lariat and goes for the pin. 2-count. Williams tags back in and continues to work over Scott’s left knee. Scott kicks out of a submission and goes for the tag but Williams attacks him to prevent it. Scott moves out of the corner, and starts kicking at Williams but Williams kick his left knee to stop the comeback. Gordy tags in and holds Scott’s arms. Williams hits a forearm. Gordy goes for the pin but Rick interrupts the count.

Snap suplex by Gordy for a 2-count. Gordy attempts a bow and arrow but can’t quite get him up so he tags in Williams. Williams hits a couple of stiff slaps to Scott’s face. Scott tries to comeback but Williams takes the knee out and knocks him to the ground. Williams turns him over for a half-Boston Crab. Williams slams the left knee into the canvas and tags Gordy in. Gordy applies his own half-Boston crab then transitions into a half-STF. The crowd cheers Scott on to make a tag. Gordy pulls him away from Rick and tags Williams back in. Williams puts on another Boston Crab.

Scott gets the tag into Rick whilst in the Crab and starts cleaning the house. Rick hits a modified powerslam (meaning botched powerslam) on Williams for a 2-count. Rick hits a Bulldog from the second rope but Gordy interferes before he can pin. Scott goes to the second rope, but Gordy clotheslines him over the top. Williams hands Rick to Gordy who’s on the second rope. Gordy hits a powerslam from the second rope and Williams goes for the pin. 2-count. Williams tries again. Another 2-count.

Gordy tags in and measures him for a dropkick. 2-count on Rick. Williams tags in and they hit a double shoulder block. 1…2…Rick kicks out! 5 minutes to go in the match. Williams hits two backbreakers then goes for the pin. Another 2-count. Gordy tags back in and hits a forearm while Williams holds Rick’s arm. Gordy hits a belly to back suplex for the 1…2…kick out! Gordy tries again, another 2-count.

Williams tags back in and chops Rick. Rick starts fighting back but Williams kicks him down and stomps on him. Williams applies a camel clutch which is a terrible idea when a time-limit draw is near. It turns into a sleeper-ish hold and Rick forearms his way out of it. Williams buries the knee into Rick’s midsection. Williams hits a suplex into a powerbomb for a 2-count. Williams puts on a front facelock (WHY?!?). 2 minutes to go in the match.

Williams and Rick trade right hands and forearms. Williams has him on his shoulder and rams him into the turnbuckle back-first. He tries for a different corner, but Rick slips out and hits a Steinerline. Gordy tags in, and Rick hits him with a Steinerline. Both men are down with 1 minute remaining. Sigh, I know where this is going…

Scott gets the hot tag and backdrops both Gordy and Williams. He then gives each man bodyslams. Scott hits a gutwrench powerbomb and hits the Frankensteiner but the bell rings before a 3-count is made.

Winners: Time Limit Draw (30:00; 28:28 by my stopwatch but maybe it’s slow); The Steiner Brothers retain the WCW World Tag Team Titles

  • A very good tag team match with two evenly-matched teams who didn’t shy away from being stiff in the ring. Williams and Gordy made a tremendous duo that I wish did more in American wrestling, and The Steiners were great as always. However the match did suffer from monotony at points and some questionable logic (why put a resthold on someone with only 2 minutes left in the match? PIN THE GUY!), not to mention the fact that the time-limit draw took the air out of the room. I understand why it happened, to prove that both teams were even in terms of toughness and ability, but the ending didn’t work as the top match on a major PPV. Had it been earlier in the card, it would have worked. Quibbles aside, a strong tag team match that highlighted both teams very well. (B)

The teams stare each other down in the ring as we take it to Schiavone and Bischoff who run down what we have just seen tonight. Bischoff hints that the Steiners/Miracle Violence Connection rivalry has just begun. Schiavone says they will have the results of the bikini contest tomorrow on Main Event. We’re back with Ross and Ventura who also go through what we just saw. They then start hyping their next PPV, The Great American Bash, and the potential main event: Sting against Big Van Vader for the WCW World Title. Ross pimps the next Clash of the Champions event as well as a host of other things before signing off. Roll credits and cheesy as hell 90’s theme.

Show Grade: B+

  • Favorite Match: Ricky Steamboat/Rick Rude
  • Least Favorite Match: Marcus Bagwell/Greg Valentine

Overall Show Thoughts:

  • WCW Beach Blast 1992 is one of the best WCW PPV’s I have ever seen; with the exception of two throwaway matches, the in-ring action was tremendous and Ross/Ventura were amazing on commentary, making every match feel important and being entertaining in their own right during lulls in some of the matches. The order of the matches were a little wobbly, Sting/Jack should have gone on last to let the audience go home happy, but I have little to no complaints about this. This is definitely a must-watch if you’re a wrestling fan…or if you’re looking to show your friends that WCW did put on quality shows pre-nWo.
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